Materialistic Monday: Drama Mama's Secrets, Part One

How lucky are you all today? The faaabulous Drama Mama is guest blogging here today to share her beauty secrets! Get your tabbing fingers ready - there's some good stuff here...enjoy!


Materialism is hard work, Wonderfriends, so I’m going to work fast and hard to get you in and out of here on this Monday morning.

The erudite and gregarious Jordan has asked me to guest on this auspicious day, mostly because she isn’t half has materialistic as I am, and partially, maybe, because she’s just tired, lazy, or both and just wants to pass the heavy lifting over to me. Never fear, mon amie, I am willing and able to transition you from the dregs of winter to the dawning of summer in just a few pithy paragraphs. Get your pens ready. And…Go!

First of all, as we move from Winter to Summer, you might notice that you are feeling… squishy, perhaps. Not heavy, but, er, well, not as toned and terrific as you’d like to be as those Land’s End Swimsuit catalogs appear fast and furious in your mailboxes. May I suggest a nice meal replacement that I’ve been doing that is filling and delicious ? (Well, let’s not go crazy here, how about pleasantly palatable?). Fiber 35 is available online, in your local health stores, and what I really like about it is that it does indeed fill one up and keeps things moving, shall we say? A few shakes throughout the day, with a Fiber Smart bar mid-day, and a salad with protein for dinner – an easy and painless way to shape up and clean out. Just in time for Land’s End season. Greet those waves with the semi-self-confidence that you deserve!

Now that your innards are singing, may I bring your attention to your skin? Yes, darling, it is lovely and wrinkle-free, but that long winter has left you –ahem- a little dull and not as baby-fine as you’d like. MAC Moisturelush line is just that – softening and hydrating and really, truly non-greasy. Truly. I would not lie to you. I do the Cremewash with my Clarisonic in the shower (oh, the ecstasy), then the Studio Moisture Fix while I dress and do my hair. By the time I get to my make-up, my face is ready to go. Friends, before I turned 40, I detested the feel of moisturizers. As it became a necessity, I searched vainly for an item that would hydrate me and not make me look like a fry cook in June. The real piece de resistance is the Moisturelush Crème at night – it goes on like a cloud, and is like a mini-facial; once you emerge from your morning shower, the effects of your nightly attempts are butter-smooth and have plumped up even the tiniest of lines – even around the mouth! Couple all of this with your Strivectin, and you are positively entering Dorian Gray territory.

Okay. Pens down. That's enough for today. Process. Rinse. Repeat. We'll see you next week at this time for the rest of Materialistic Monday Terrorist Takeover by Drama Mama. Please do your homework.

Materialistic Monday: Rush Hour

Aaahhhh, Rush Hour, how do I love thee...

You are the perfect blend of creamy color that looks good no matter the season and with whatever I'm wearing. I keep you in my purse and also in my work bag for those moments when I need a dash of color: pronto!

Rush Hour, you are perfect on my lips and cheeks, making you the ultimate in quick fixes. I cheated a couple of times - yes, my dear, I know! - and learned that any old lipstick won't do the trick.

Roses are Red
Rush Hour is, too,
I'll wear you always
I swear - I'll be true.

Materialistic Monday: Cashmere

Until January of this year, I had never owned anything cashmere, nor had I bought anything at Bloomingdale's. Within two days, I had two cashmere hoodies, and Matt liked them so much that he went out and bought one, too. At Bloomingdale's.

This is all thanks to Kristen. You may know her as a very thoughtful and kind blogger, a wonderful writer. Sure, that's all true, but I also know her as my personal shopper. Because once Kristen, Queen of Cashmere, found out that I didn't own a cashmere sweater, she made it her job to change that. You think I'm joking? Exaggerating? I am not.

I will let Kristen herself tell you about her cashmere addiction obsession adoration because I cannot do it justice. First there was the IM chat in which she extolled the virtues of cashmere: it's soft, adjusts to your body temperature, perfect for a climate like Chicago! Then there was the email with some ideas about where to shop for my cashmere sweater (high end department store sale racks, J. Crew, Lands End). Later, when it became clear that I was interested but wasn't taking the initiative to buy the sweater fast enough, there was the email with a series of actual links to four cashmere sweaters that Kristen had judged to be the best quality for the best price in stores at that moment.

If someone had told me that blogging would yield a personal shopper in New York willing to help me pick out a good cashmere sweater, I would have started a LOT sooner. Because as soon as I had a free Sunday afternoon, I went to Bloomingdale's, where they were having a fantastic sale on cashmere sweaters. I took about 10 black cardigans into the dressing room (because Kristen had also insisted I make my first one a black cardigan and at this point I was willing to do whatever she said) and found one I loved so very much that I also bought it in pink (and hey, looks like they still have it and it's still marked down!).

I cannot tell you how much I love these sweaters, but especially the black one (she was right, of course). I wear it almost every day. I also bought some cashmere-lined black leather driving gloves from Nordstrom after Christmas and I adore those as well. My hands have stayed so toasty, and they're incredibly soft. Aaaaahh...cashmere.

Right now my black hoodie is waiting to be washed, and I am really missing it. Speaking of washing it, I am still unsure about the best way to care for it. My understanding is that my choices are hand wash or dry clean. When I dry cleaned it once, it came back less soft, but Kristen tells me that hers have been fine and I need to try a new dry cleaner. I found this piece at Friday Style, all about caring for cashmere, that I wanted to share with you and in it Susan Wagner begs me to hand wash it. Anyone else want to weigh in on that?

So, yes. People who tell you that cashmere is wonderful are right. And so are friends who are willing to shop for me. Kristen, have I mentioned that I'm in the market for some spring slacks?

Yes. No. Maybe.

Yes, I am aware that it is Materialistic Monday.

No, I am not prepared.

Yes, I will be at the friggin' nursery school "gala" fund raiser this evening, drinking wine and finding another $100 worth of items to bid on in the auction so that we'll have met our friggin' $500 per family annual fund-raising goal.

Yes, I do think they should just raise the tuition by $500 per year and leave me alone with the fund-raising, already.

Yes, I'll be praying that someone bids on my donated speech-language evaluation so that I don't have to purchase anything else at all.

No, I'm not bitter. Why do you ask?

Maybe, if I buy something really fantastic, I'll try it out on the way home and post about it later. But I doubt it.

Yes, you do have to come back another day for my Materialistic Monday post because I'm cookin' up a good one.

No, I won't keep babbling. I need to go home.

Materialistic Monday: Safety 1st High-Def Digital Monitor

Night One
It was midnight last Wednesday. We were wrenched out of deep sleep by sudden, horrible screaming. "Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!", Lyle screamed in a really unusual, horrifying way. Matt tore off downstairs. Seconds later it changed to, "Mommy! Mommy!" and I followed. But by the time I got down to the kids' level, Matt was leaving their room, shaking his head. "It's not him," he said.

It wasn't Lyle.

This had happened before. We are in a condo building where three other young children live. If our monitor is on the wrong channel, we pick up the signal from one of them in the middle of the night and get scared shitless for no reason whatsoever. Hearts pounding, grateful that Lyle was fine, we finally went back to sleep.

Night Two
It was 11 pm. I picked up the monitor. "Is this on the right channel for sure?" I asked Matt, who was already in bed. "Yeah, we changed it after last night," he replied. I felt uncertain. The loud static wasn't exactly the same as its usual loud static. I switched it back and forth to demonstrate this. But he insisted. And we were both so tired that we decided it had to be fine and was not worth testing. After all, the kids so rarely wake up during the night and our sleep was disturbed last night - we were sure to be fine even if it wasn't fixed (you see where this is going, don't you?). So off we went to la-la land.

Until 1 am. Never have I been jarred from sleep in this way. In my life. I pulled myself out of an intense dream (I recall pushing people out of the way in my dream in order to get myself up to the surface of consciousness), only to start screaming. Loudly. I was screaming because Matt was screaming. Matt was screaming because, from somewhere else in the house, both of the boys were screaming. At the top of their lungs. As if the house were on fire. That is truly what I believed (in my semi-consciousness) must have been happening. We could hear someone pounding up the stairs towards us, screaming and crying. I fought my way off of our bed, not even aware of my screaming, and pushed towards the doorway, where Matt had stopped to meet Baxter. Matt turned to me in half-asleep anger, and hollered, "WHY ARE YOU STILL SHOUTING?" Trying to catch my breath, I shouted, "WHERE'S LYLE?? WHAT'S GOING ON?"

Matt could see that Lyle was running up the stairs screaming and crying behind Baxter, but I couldn't, being trapped in the bedroom and all. Once all four of us were in each other's arms in the doorway, it became abundantly clear that all of us had been hollering at the very top of our lungs together.

"I had an earache," cried Baxter.

Um, an earache?! You mean the house is neither on fire nor full of armed militiamen?

"I was calling for you and calling for you," he started wailing, "and you didn't come! And then Lyle woke up and he was calling for you, too. When I came upstairs to find you, he got scared and upset and started to scream and chased me. I was so scared that I started running and screaming, too!" We were all shaking.

Holy Mary Mother of God, you have no idea what it sounded like. If not for the storm we were stuck in last summer in Michigan, this would have been my scariest parenting moment ever. We took the kids into bed with us and held them tight for the rest of the night. It took some of us many hours to fall asleep again.

Enter: a new monitor. One that not only does NOT pick up any neighbors' children but has no static whatsoever. It is clear as a bell. And only one channel that only connects to my own children's room! Imagine! I could go on and on about this monitor but I'm sure many of my readers have no use for one anymore. Just know that if you do need one, or know anyone who does, this Safety 1st High-Def Digital Monitor is truly amazing and you can read all about it here. It also looks damn cool, like something from the Apple store, which you know will always make us happy. We have always leaned towards the $19.99 baby monitors, but this time no price was too steep to guarantee that we would always hear our kids - and only our kids - during the night.

We're all sleeping better now.

Materialistic Monday: TomTom

Okay, I know. If you've been following Cindy (as you should be), you've heard about this recently. In fact, I had a few ideas for this week's post that you might not have read about in the past two point five minutes.

However.

My Tom Tom GPS saved my ass so many times in California this past week that now I cannot NOT write about it.

You see, in the weeks before Christmas, I was asked by Baxter to explain what a GPS system is because we were giving one to Matt's Dad for Christmas. I had never thought of one for myself, had never even been in a vehicle with one, at the time. But partway through my description of what it does, I flashed to all the Google Maps I constantly print out for myself and carry around with me, and I recall saying vaguely, "Actually, I could probably use one of those myself!" And the rest was history.

According to Matt, there was no getting him off the topic. No attempts of "How about some earrings?" or "Mommy would love a massage..." would move the child. "No. Mommy wants a GPS," he told Matt with determination. He wouldn't even budge for the old tangerines and beer fall back gift, which he insisted on giving to each of his parents the year he was 3.

No, it was to be a GPS. So my guys bought one for me.

And, let me tell you, it rocks! As Cindy mentioned, I keep mine set to a British man's voice, "Tim", who instructs me to "stay on the left lane" and "keep on the motorway", which is about the only thing that could make Hwy 101 interesting.

But beyond Tim's fantastic voice, I do enjoy that he tells me how to actually get places. Quickly! He remembers all of my destinations, which is handy, and has all sorts of options such as showing all parking garages in the vicinity, which was extremely helpful a couple times last week.

I also love the "Do you need to be there by a certain time?" feature. For example, last week when I had to be at the SCERTS training by 8:30 am in the suburbs of San Francisco, I plugged in the address the night before and it told me what time I had to leave in order to arrive by 8:30, thereby making sure I allowed enough time. Furthermore, it continually re-calculates my time as I'm driving, so when I hit bad traffic I could see the "new and not-so-improved" time of arrival getting updated and was able to send a text message to say I was going to arrive late and by how long (it's handy when the presenter is a personal friend!).

On another occasion in the past week, I left the conference one night and drove off towards my aunt's house for dinner. I knew the way so I didn't use my Tom Tom, of course (because it's not the first week anymore, sillies!). However, I accidentally went north instead of south on the highway (proving once again that it's been a while since I've actually lived out there) and when I got off the exit realized I had chosen poorly and couldn't just get right back on. Oops. Did I mention that this was in the middle of a major rainstorm? I didn't have her address with me but remembered the cross streets and that was enough. I stopped, programmed the intersection into my Tom Tom, and my courteous friend Tim got me there.

I am All. Over. It.

Thanks, Bax.

Materialistic Monday: Nissan Stainless Travel Mug

In the past 8 years, have you ever worked with me? Been at an IEP with me, met me for an observation at your child's school, or stopped to chat with me at my desk? Driven in the car with me? Have you met me at the park on a Saturday, seen me at a child's birthday party, or been in a music class with me and one of my kids? Have you ever seen me in church or been at a family gathering with me?

If you can answer "yes" to any one of the above, then you've already seen this coffee mug.

I don't think we've discussed my obsession with coffee, but that will have to wait.

Because today it's all about the travel mug.

I know, I know. It's not a sexy topic like cosmetics, or a cute way to please Al Gore, but Materialistic Monday is simply about Things I Love. And I love this travel mug.

You see, I don't drink my coffee at home and then stick the mug in the sink dishwasher and head out the door. Most days, I fill this baby with some really hot, freshly ground, dark roast coffee early in the morning, and drink it all day. And I do mean all day. Far too often I'm still working on my morning coffee on my drive home at 5:00 - although, to be fair, some days I do refill it from a thermos at work. But even when it's the same coffee I poured at 8 AM, it is still plenty warm at 5 PM. Yes, it's true! 9 hours later! I can even leave it in the car on a very cold day for an hour or so and it's warm when I return.

(And tangentially, I haven't even mentioned to you all how cold it's been here lately...most of yesterday it was below zero (and with a wind chill of -20 degrees, my friends). You will only find this interesting if you don't live in Minnesota or Alaska. Or Canada. Any readers out there in Canada? Because I spent 6 years living in Minnesota, I have a hard time thinking of -20 as that cold, but it actually is. I mean, we still go about our business and all, but it takes a lot of bundling up and the wind can be painful. That coffee needs to stay warm, people.)

It also has the perfect snap top and fits into any car's drink holders. I don't care how many bags I'm carrying to work, you will always - always! - see me balancing this coffee mug in my hand as I struggle to hold onto the less important stuff (you know, like my laptop).

Eight years old, it's missing a bit of its gleam. It recently lost its black gripper. The musical note sticker that Baxter affixed to it when he was 4 years old threatens to peel off, and I had to put a new name label on it this year (because MY GOD, what if I lost it?!).

But like a child's favorite stuffed animal that becomes shabbier with love and use, it only gets better.

Materialistic Monday: Envirosax bags

Oh, have I got a treat for you! This week's treasure is, well, actually five treasures.

Out in my car is a very small nylon sack. In that sack are five tiny rolled-up bags that snap closed.

When I hit the grocery store, Target, Benefit, whatever, I grab the sack out of my glove compartment and throw it into my purse, where it sits until check-out time.

And that, my friends, is where the Envirosax party begins! Out comes the sack and with a little flick of the wrist and a shwoop! I open each of the five bags and hand them over to the bagger, who stares in utter disbelief at how big and sturdy these bags are. Each one holds the equivalent of two environmentally-unfriendly and wimpy plastic grocery bags.

But have I mentioned how cool they look? I happen to have gotten the Retro Graphic set for Christmas (placed on our family's online giftlist by my very own self) and I love them! I gave my mom the 50s-looking Kitchen Graphic set and those are pretty darn cute, too. Every cashier at our local grocery store loves these bags and stops to write down the web site. And since the sack of bags lives in my car all the time, I am no longer getting to the store and realizing that I left my huge pile of bulky canvas bags at home.

Do not pass Go.

Do not stop to collect $200.

Get thee to the Envirosax web site.

Materialistic Monday: Eye Concealer

When Matt and I met, I wore no make-up and the color pink hadn't touched my body in years. I probably didn't shave my legs at that point, either, seeing as how I was in the Women's Studies program at a small liberal arts college and involved in MPIRG on the side. Times have changed - and if you stop and think about it, perhaps we should all be grateful for the changes that have taken place, because imagine if you were frozen in 1993? Shudder.

But let's move on.

I was accompanied to the cosmetics counter of a department store by my mother when it was time to buy some make-up for my wedding in 1996 (I did my own hair and make-up for the wedding because the idea of having someone else do that crap made me gag with the preciousness of it all), and the fruits of that trip were still the only make-up in my possession when Baxter was born in 2000.

And then came the children. Is it about having babies and feeling more in touch with one's feminine side (and exhausted, pathetic, "what about me?" side)? Or maybe having boys and needing to claim one's new role of being the only woman in the house? I don't know, but all I can say is that every time I have another son I buy more pink and a lot more make-up. Thank god there will be no more children or I'd need my own bathroom.

Soon after Baxter was born I walked into a Benefit cosmetics store in Mill Valley, California and never looked back. I go in every few weeks in order to keep my eyebrows from taking over the entire top 2/3 of my face, and always enjoy a little sampling of the goods. I tend to ask for Benefit cosmetics for birthdays, Christmas, et cetera and by now have an impressive supply. (Matt gets lots of credit for freelancing on gifts there.) But for the very first time, about two weeks ago, the fantastically flamboyant young man who waited on me (I love this guy, and not only because he transports me back to many such interactions in San Francisco) pulled out the eye concealer. Now, this shouldn't be a shock, I think that was the week when the wheels were seriously falling off the bus. I'm sure the bags under my eyes had taken on a life of their own.

The product he tried on me had to be purchased immediately, and I have been using it nearly every day because it truly hides the puffy circles I wake up with but doesn't look caked on or fake. It's called Lyin' Eyes and it's the best $13 I have spent in a long while. Now, drama mama commented last week that she uses Boi-ing, which I then discovered I have in my Realness of Concealness set (another treasure to check out if you want to try a few of their best goodies - this is a great one to throw into your handbag). Boi-ing appears to be a heavier-duty concealer that looks like it's meant for the lids as well, and it was great. For me, a solid application of Lyin' Eyes, along with a little magic from my Eye Bright pencil and Lemon Aid on the lid (oh, how I love Lemon Aid!) does the trick. But be advised that you can't go wrong with Benefit. In addition to their web site, their products are available at Macy's and Sephora. If you are lucky enough to live near an actual Benefit store (thank goodness one opened in Chicago the minute we moved here), stop on in - if only for the fun atmosphere and to marvel over the brilliance of their product naming team. And if you live near me, invite me along.

My, how the times have changed.